Published January 4, 2008
I wrote this over a small bag of pretzels yesterday, as a prank that I gave to someone who clearly wanted to plagiarize it, and confirmed this just a few minutes ago, sending me:
"It is for school.
but don't tell anyone.
What is your nanowrimo novel about?"
And by the way, he misspelled my name 'Ant' (the horror) so I decided to make a joke of that. And according to him, he really has had this "girlfriend" since he was 4 or 5. Also, wouldn't even be posting this if not to show up on Google if someone suspects plagiarism. 
So anyway, now presenting, the absolute worst piece I have ever done, counting "Spinach Floor" when I was 3, ladies and gentlemen, The Traveling Christmas Flamingo Who Went To Iowa!
---
(the following is an email I sent)
Heya. Here's the story, by Aet Lindling. OOPS. OMIGOD. I MEANT ANT. ANT LINDLING.
How is your girlfriend doing? You know, the one you've had since you were 4 or 5?
Anyway, I'm just stalling, here's your very titillating story.
The traveling christmas flamingo was under no circumstances pink, not in anyway whatsoever. It was fulvous, and virescent, and at times even arousing. As the bulge in his pants grew larger, he decided to take a trip to Iowa, to find some lookers. He didn't have the mazuma necessary, though, and so he decided to set up a sign. It said "Procreativeness for a Buck". When he had acquired the cash, from selling his procreativeness, he bought a plane ticket to Iowa. While he was up in the air, he joined the Mile-High Club. He joined it over and over again, with different people, as a matter of fact. Whotta player.
Then, he arrived! At Iowa! Hurray! But unfortunately, it appeared all the lookers and hookers around had eaten by the Coitionmonster! He said "Oh no, that won't do!" Then he lacerated the pudenda of the Coitionmonster. It fell, dead. Then he took all the lookers and hookers out, and had a wonderful time, having a roll in the hay with all the fun lookers and hookers. And that was the story of the traveling christmas flamingo.
The End.
Could you tell me what it's for, though? If it's school, I don't mind, don't worry. 
I just wanna know.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
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Original Text:
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141,247 Literary Works • 674,329 Reviews
omg!! hahahah this is sooo retarded. i dont even get it!! lol. *wipes tear* haha. whooo. and i dont really get what he was saying bout that whole
"It is for school.
but don't tell anyone.
What is your nanowrimo novel about?"
lol oh well. Go you for being soo original!!
hahaha
haha, THAT was funny...stupid tho...
i don't think the kid would get a good grade for that anyways, even if it wasn't plagiarizing. lol!
XD
That is the best thing ever. I lol'd.
XDXDXD I still find this incredibly hilarious! Butter, you're wierd.
But, awesome as always! *high fives*
~Rieda
XD
You have got to be kidding me.
Why in the world would anybody want to plagiarize this?
Go Aet!
*rolls on floor laughing*
Only Aet could come up with something so utterly bad but strangely funny. Hehe.
Woo, already!
Google traveling christmas flamingo and this is the top result.
What an idiot. Hooray Aet for giving him a right smackdown! Cookies for you!
Aet is mah hero! One of them, at least.
Love it. <3
-Saint Razorblade
The Official YWS Pirate
I'm not even going to attempt critique, since it is kind of obvious that that is not the point.
*smacks the not-pink flamingo for being such a bad boy*
~GryphonFledgling